Champions

Second team to win two consecutive NIT championships!

G O
G A M E C O C K S

(yeah, it's NIT, but I really don't care.)

George Mason?

Okay, I’m sorry, but today’s basketball events just beg to be commented on.

First off, accolades to Florida for knocking out Villanova 75 to 62. However, since all I know about Villanova is that they were a number one seed, they’re in Pennsylvania, and the school’s name sounds like a bad drag queen, I’m pretty indifferent to their loss.

But, there was another game today.



GOOD LORD. Where did George Mason come from? This number eleven seed just knocked off the number one seed UConn, 86 to 84 in overtime. This number eleven seed just beat the last two national champions (UConn and UNC). This number eleven seed just blindsided everyone.

There are no more number one seeds left in the tournament. And with that fact, I think it's safe to say that about 98% of the brackets are now decapitated. I can't wait 'till Saturday--people, it's on!

I. LOVE. THIS. GAME.

Live Action Simpsons

In the interest of those of you who have no interest in basketball, and thus may have been bored by my blog lately, here’s a little internet treasure:

Tonight, the legendary opening credits of The Simpsons will be done by live actors! That’s right; live action Homer, Bart, Marge, Lisa, and Maggie!

Besides the lack of spiky and beehive hairdos, the accuracy of the video is amazing. So, in case you will miss this landmark Simpsons moment, I provide you with this link.


http://www.tvgasm.com/archives/miscellaneous_tv/001828.php

Beware of the Brackets

I have never been so engrossed in one sports event as I am in the Basketball Tourney (which may be due to the fact that the tourney is several sporting events, but you get my point). My weekend plans are now built around when the best games are on and I’m able to discuss teams and players with some degree of knowledge (although my knowledge usually amounts to reiterating what I’ve heard on ESPN and CBS).

But one piece of knowledge that I have acquired all on my own is this: DO NOT FILL OUT A BRACKET. Ever since Friday, I’ve had multiple friends complain that their brackets are screwed up/dead/destroyed/obliterated/or currently serving as mulch in a hamster cage. My friends have lost money because no one expected Bradley to do this well, and they’ve lost pride because…really…Wichita State? Now, these friends won't be able to fully enjoy upcoming games because they'll be praying that the remains of thier once great bracket will be survive 'till the end.

Luckily, my basketball naivety prevented me from even attempting to guess which teams would go how far. As such, I am able to watch and simply enjoy the athleticism and occasional buzzer beaters. I can learn more about the game without bemoaning my ignorance of Georgetown and their apparent awesomeness. I have no extraneous concerns about how one team’s win or loss will personally affect me.

Now, I will say that the losses acquired by North Carolina and NC State suck (really UNC, George Mason, come on now). And yes, I am now relegated to root for Duke and Boston College, simply based on their “local boys” status and ACC ties respectively. But I didn’t lose any money, or pride, due to the UNC or NC State loss, so I can deal.

So, I suggest to you my friends, stay away from building brackets (unless you’re a compulsive gambler, in which case, stop watching sports altogether). But you probably won’t heed any of my warnings, so I’ll be here to console you next year when—let’s see what would be random—Northern Iowa beats Texas.

Homosexual Repellent

Let me first say that I have wanted to comment on the Dubai Port deal, the resulting Republican Congressional revolt against The White House, and the enervated President for some time. However, the whole situation changes every day. Thus, I’m going to wait until the situation seems relatively resolved…then see if I still care.

Now, to the post proper:

Today was another beautiful, spring-like day that just screamed for me to spend some time outside. So, I headed over to Caffé Driade, which is a lovely, intimate, locally-owned coffee shop with great outdoor sitting areas and an open-air interior.

Upon arrival, I walked up to make my drink order and was greeted by a tattoo-covered, funky hair, slightly emaciated male employee. Now, Tattoo-guy (as he shall hereafter be called) was obviously gay, but if you know me, I go for preppy guys. Thus, I was fairly indifferent about interacting with the first gay guy that I’ve come across since…um…forever.

So, I got my drink, and sat down to begin studying the GRE. After about an hour, when I finally began to actually understand percentages, a guy dressed like a Banana Republic model walked into the shop. His excellent wardrobe, 4 o’clock shadow, and general attractiveness peaked my interest. “Hmmm,” I thought, “this could be promising.” So I turned on my game of…trying to make eye contact, because if you recall, that’s my only game (sigh).

However, a few seconds after I spotted Banana Republic-guy (hereafter, that’ll be his name), he and his female friend left the shop. I shrugged off my missed opportunity and continued my studying. Then, I turned to my right and saw Banana Republic-guy waiting in line. I awkwardly contorted myself to try to see if he was looking even remotely in my direction, but alas, he did not seem to notice me.

So, when Banana Republic-guy is next in line, Tattoo-guy asks how he can help him. To this, Banana Republic-guy hands Tattoo-guy a card and says, “I wanted you to have my number.” HIS NUMBER! Banana Republic-guy just hit on Tattoo-guy. I. Am. Shocked.

Now, I know different people have different taste, but what the hell? How did I get overlooked for Tattoo-guy. When did someone spray me with homosexual repellent?

To add insult to injury, once Banana Republic-guy left, Tattoo-guy got all gitty. In fact, despite the fact that he apparently just got into a new relationship two weeks ago, he couldn't help but tell all his friends at the coffee shop what just happen-which meant that I had to hear the story repeated. A lot. I mean, really, Tattoo-guy (who's in a relationship) gets hit on, and I (single and preppy) don't? Once again, I throw up my hands in defeat.

Related to this disheartening episode (and in case you were wondering) according the mutual friends, Sam is not gay, I haven’t seen John since that night, and Patrick never called me back. In addition, gay internet connection sites have produced nothing except for one particularly self-centered jerk. I’m sorry to say that today did not help elevate my frustration and hopelessness on the issue of finding a mate anytime this decade. (sigh, again.)

But, on a funny-and purely inconsequential-note, apparently my blog has spawned another blog. I guess this makes Nick’s blog a grandfather.